So, What's In The News?

Two journalists, Laura Ling and Euna Lee, were freed from a North Korean prison, ending what was supposed to have been a 12-year sentence of hard labor in camps. Bill Clinton was the interventionist. Can't you imagine that conversation?
GOV: President Clinton, we need you to help us with North Korea.
Bill: What's up? Ain't Barack in charge now?
GOV: Well, we need your "persuasive talents." We have 2 journalists in North Korean prisons that we want back. They do not deserve 12-year sentences, and we think you have what it takes to help.
Bill: Well, I dunno. I got a meeting with the New York Ladies Club tonight.
GOV: Bill, they're female journalists in a women's prison.
Bill: My schedule just opened up!

Three American hikers were taken into custody in Iran while hiking in the northern part of Iran. Let me repeat...3 Americans were arrested...IN IRAN...WHILE HIKING. It's a big world, and while I hate to see Americans in trouble, I honestly am having difficulty feeling any sympathy for these three. What in the hell were you doing hiking in Iran????? And did you think they would see you and say, " Ahhh, pale faces enjoying the natural beauty of our homeland. Enjoy!" Don't we have parks, mountains and caves here? Don't you think you could have maybe gone to, I dunno, Yellowstone? What part of you thought, "Hey, you know where we've never gone and I have heard it's just beautiful in August? Iran."

3. John Hughes died. Now, that's sad. Listen to this catalog: Ferris Bueller, Breakfast Club, Sixteen Candles, Planes Trains and Automobiles, Great Outdoors, Mr. Mom, Vacation/European Vacation/Christmas Vacation, Pretty in Pink, Uncle Buck, Home Alone and Weird Science. His movies defined a generation, and yet we're talking about Michael Jackson having a third autopsy, just in case the first 2 which clearly showed an abuse of drugs were wrong.